Day 16

i just make it short.

kak Leen broke down.
she lose her strength.

Mak getting weaker.

the others, sorry. I cannot mention anything about them. for personal reason.
starting from now, I will only talk about MY FAMILY.
its not that I'm discriminating, but its for our own good.

deep down inside, agak menyesal blog aku diketahui oleh family members.
rase agak limited.
you guys know right, when it comes to family issues, silly things pon can be sensitive. masing2 fikir kepentingan sendiri.
enough said lah.
my point is ; put yourself in the other shoes and stop thinking about your own self.

aku paling benci if something dah happen, masing2 nk menuding jari. seboleh boleh nak point salah dkt orang. cube stop and fikir gune kepale hotak kau dulu.

in Yana's case, for me. I called it fate.
genetic ke, salah bagi makan ke, hape kan. SUDAH. enough.
its already happen, stop pointing at someone else, and start the treatment.

as you noticed, no names mentioned right. so, this could be anyone, including me.
kalau kau bace, kau terase. sumpah aku tak rase bersalah.
walaupon hati aku bercakap pasal seseorang, tp tak gune aku mention. sbb useless.
aku fikir kepentingan orang lain jugak, bkn kepentingan aku sorang je.

yes. kak Leen lose her strength. kalau strength tu bule di ukur gune penimbang berat, kak Leen dh bule dikategorikan sbg Bulemia Anorexia.
haih.
kakak aku tu, tinggal sekeping je. bile aku pandang muke dia, aku bule rase kan beban yg dipikul. bkn la aku katekan Yana ni beban, tak. Yana ini lumrah. tp, aku bule rase kan, tanggungjawab yg kak Leen pikul.
kerja, anak, suami, mertua, keluarga, diri sendiri.

bayang kan kan kalau kau di posisi dia.
kalau aku, hidup segan mati tak mahu.

Pole cakap aku tough lady.
kak Leen broke down. Mak getting weaker.
aku kene getting stronger.
how?

ade satu perkara penting yg aku belom umumkan di sini. ntah la. jari2 gemok pendek ni mmg tabule nak type tentang perkara tu.
haih.

melalut sugguh update hari ni. huwm

Yana masuk darah. dia off chemo for 2 days. bone marrow fluid will be taken on friday or saturday. again.
her fever getting better. alhamdulillah.
but the inside. platelets, haemoglobin, all those things that I can pronouce and have no idea how to spell pon still weak.

summary of this update ;

everything and everybody is getting WEAK.