confession

its been almost 3 months and frankly to say that I am STILL NOT fully recevered.
on the name of the god, yes. I've felt like a shit.
I just dont know why it is so so hard for me to get over him.
I mean, look at him, he's got himself a new girlfriend. erh.
so much for the "no no, I wont leave you, no matter what happen I'm gonna be there for you cause you are my responsibility"
bullshit .
chop. or maybe he still remember me or our memories together its just that he is so so ego to admit it.
maybe
hah. no wayy.
i can still remember what he text me
he said I am much more mean than him. wtfk.
he text "kmu dan sy takde kene mengene"
god knows how much it hurts.
god knows how much I cried
god knows how pain my chest is.
god knows.
yes, I can say that I am happy now, I can laugh my ass off
but, it wont last longer.
whenever I'm alone, my brain will changed to a time machine, where it will automatically view all our memories together.
again, bullshit.
I cant hear to a hardcore song cause he looove hardcore.
he is the one that introduce me to that kind of music
I cant hear any sound of guitar, it will remembered me of how he is always playing guitar for me
I cant see a man playing a drum because that will remind me of how he used to loooove smashing the skool table with any kind of stick that he can found and later on he will made me kept it for him
I cant sit on the bench in front of my house because that is where I met him for the last time
enough .
there is so so so many things that reminds me of him.
too much to be listed and its wayy priivate and confidential :P
shut ut brain.
stop typing finger.
why, I just dont understand.

to him, come back to me please.
but if you happy now, if you are so comfortable with you new life, your new situation
then, I wish all the happiness.
no matter how hurt I am, but seeing you happy can make me feel better
eventhough your happy without me

p/s : I'm sorry peeps. I dont have anyone to talk with. told you I cant be alone cause this will happen. fak !